The Healing Power of Human Connection: What is Lacking in AI Therapy
I was recently out to dinner with a few friends when the conversation turned, as it inevitably does these days, to AI. Some admitted they had been trying an AI therapy bot and wanted to know what I thought.
There are many understandable reasons someone might choose to use AI for therapeutic support: cost, accessibility, professional barriers, fear of judgment, or the need for help in the middle of the night. In addition, some people have also found AI effective at delivering structured, goal-oriented interventions like we see in CBT, which allows users to work on a therapeutic goal such as reducing anxiety or overcoming a fear.
That said, a key part of what makes therapy so beneficial is actually the therapeutic relationship. Across decades of research, the relationship between a person and their therapist has emerged as one of the strongest predictors of therapeutic success. In fact, the quality of the relationship is often more predictive of positive outcomes than any specific therapeutic technique. Neuroscience supports this too: brain imaging studies show that empathic, attuned relationships help regulate the limbic system, reducing stress responses and increasing feelings of safety.
Therapy as a Corrective Emotional Experience
Therapy can offer emotionally reparative experiences within the therapeutic relationship. We refer to this as a corrective emotional experience, and it occurs when, in the safety of a trusting relationship, a person has a different kind of emotional encounter than they have come to expect based on past experiences. This new experience can begin to rewrite long-held beliefs about relationships and self.
For example, someone who grew up being met with rejection when expressing sadness may expect the same response in adulthood and, as a result, learn to suppress those feelings. It may take time for this person to feel safe enough to express sadness in therapy, but when they do, and are instead met with empathy and care, something powerful happens: the nervous system learns that connection and vulnerability can coexist. Repeated experiences of expressing emotion and being met with understanding begin to rewire the brain and reshape expectations of others.
Disconnection and Its Costs
In recent years, rates of anxiety, loneliness, and depression have surged, especially among younger generations. A 2023 survey by Cigna found that nearly 60% of U.S. adults report feeling lonely on a regular basis. And according to a comprehensive 2024 review published in World Psychiatry, both loneliness and social isolation are independent and significant risk factors for depression and anxiety.
We live in a paradoxical age: hyper-connected digitally, yet increasingly disconnected emotionally. The kind of attuned, face-to-face connection that helps regulate our nervous systems has become more and more rare.
Therapy offers an antidote: a space for meaningful human contact. When a therapist holds your story with compassion, you begin to internalize that compassion for yourself. When you risk showing vulnerability and it is met with understanding, your internal sense of safety expands. These are deeply embodied experiences that can’t be replicated by AI.
